If someone ever did a per-capita Olympic medal calculation, India would be at the bottom of the heap. [Update 01/08/2012: There is one, and India is at the bottom of the heap.] In some ways, that's a no-win situation. Winning medals at international events takes serious investment, and only rich countries (or communist countries who make it a matter of pride) can afford to spend that kind of money. So either India gets ridiculed for not winning medals, or it gets criticised for wasting money on sports when there are "so many starving millions", as the critics will be quick to scream.
Fair enough, but Indians can at least maintain a sense of humour, can't they?
At the opening ceremony of the London Olympics, a young Indian woman in a red top and blue trousers joined the athletes and marched at the head of the Indian delegation.
Three cheers for Madhura Nagendra!
Indian officialdom reacted in the way it knows best.
The head of the Indian delegation, P K M Raja, said the woman had "embarrassed us in front of the world". (There are far more embarrassing things about India, Mr. Raja. Where do we start? Corruption? The complete non-governance of the government? The loser mentality?)
Calling the incident "bizarre", he said the Indian team would be demanding an apology. (From whom? Nobody owes you any apology. Stop taking yourselves so bloody seriously and learn to laugh at the ridiculous.)
"The Indian contingent was shown for just 10 seconds and to think this lady hogged all the limelight," said Mr Raja. ("Boo hoo! Because these 10 seconds are the only chance our athletes have of being in the limelight.")
Me, I had a hearty laugh. Indians have arrived at last, I thought. We can play practical jokes with the best of them. Here are two of my personal heroes of the art of gatecrashing:
Chas Licciardello of The Chasers penetrating deep into the security cordon surrounding George W Bush during the APEC meet, -- dressed as Osama bin Laden!
Claude Khazizian (with the red handkerchief), a distinguished-looking betting shop employee, who loved to bluff his way past security and pose with heads of state
Do these people not deserve our applause and adulation? Breathes there a man with soul so dead, who never to himself hath said, "This is a joke, a hilarious riot"?
Fortunately, the disgracefully humourless behaviour of the Indian official was somewhat mitigated by that bulwark of sanity, the cartoonist. This is a sample.
(Now somebody is going to take offence at the Indian flag being shown upside-down)
Thanks to that cartoon, India, you've barely managed to win the Bronze for humour. We expect better the next time.
5 comments:
Talking about Olympics, we Indians are not fast. But we are good at fasting ! We undertake several fast unto deaths and live long ! It is like the Tamil box office star Rajnikant joke - he has counted to infinity twice !
Agree with you fully on “winning medals at international events takes serious investment, and only rich countries (or communist countries who make it a matter of pride) can afford to spend that kind of money”. Sports at this stratospherical level is more of starting yearly that is identifying kids at tender age putting lot of money, training and even researching on undetectable drugs. No wonder even countries like North Korea are doing well. I don’t think there is anything to be ashamed of in this. What we should perhaps be ashamed is the not so great positions in Maths and other olympiad gold medals
Performance enhancing drugs are being masked. Look at men sprinters from USA, France, Britain, Canada etc. They are all of African stock but they look like bulls running on two legs..Their arms are as big and as muscular as their drugs - I will not surprised if these guys can run as fast on their hands upside down as they can on their legs !. Take a look at sprinters from African continent ( Frankie Fredericks of Namibia of a bygone era is a good example )- they are all tall, thin and wiry. The Caribbean sprinters are in between. Another dichotomy- a Chinese woman swimmer 16 years old wins 200 medley event and there is insinuation of drug abuse. A Lithuaninan school girl 15 years old wins 100 m breast stroke event, it is all clean and hard work and the focus is on her blond hair. Will not be surprised if Lithuania is on Euro / NATO side !
What is ironic is that there are several Indians in Olympic squad who have won medals at World Championships of their respective discipline in weight lifting, shooting, wrestling etc but do not progress to mentionable levels in Olympics. One can only conclude that these were not the true World championship which is there for track and field events but more on the line of Miss Universe/ Miss World - just branding.
If only they also had an olympics at getting into a Mumbai Local train or managing in the chaos !! India wud possibly win hands down.
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